There is no one else for me

There is no one else for me,
None but Jesus
Crucified to set me free
Now I live to bring Him praise

In the chaos and confusion
I know You're sovereign still
In the moment of my confusion
You give me grace to do Your will
This my song through all my days

All my delight is in You Lord
All of my hope
All of my strength
All my delight is in You Lord
Forever more

-Hillsong "None but Jesus"

So, I sit here at my parent's house. A week ago, I was in the Czech Republic. Yesterday, I was at church in Wilmington. This Sunday, I will be attending Creekside Community Church in Gainesville, FL for the first time. What a whirlwind of chaos. Amidst goodbyes and culture shock, I find myself numb and overwhelmed.

Today, I am glad the 2 weeks of goodbyes are over, and have had a chance to think about the next step and even be excited.

I drove the 4 hours back to Gilbert from Wilmington today and was able to think through lessons learned in Czech. In a word, the entire experience was incredible. Looking back on the two camps, I almost see it from a 3rd person perspective. Even as people surrounded me in Wilmington on Sunday, I was shocked. "I didn't do this... this wasn't me" running through my head. Seeing so clearly that God is using me and to Him alone be the glory. So humbled by it as well. So 24/7 loving campers and building bridges to share the gospel, running alongside amazing brothers and sisters and encouraging one another on the battle field, using prayer as our war time walkie talkie and not the domestic intercom it's turned into in so many churches and places.
With that, I look back on it with some reflection on the things God taught me personally... this is what I was made for, what my heart resonates with! I am resolved if it does not help me do that better, I do not want it... a renewed desire for God's best for serving Him alone... that my glory may sing [His] praise and not be silent. Not being legalistic, but challenging...and that idea of why would I want anything else than that purpose I saw so clearly worked out at camp? I want to remember that in my times of discontentment, times of being so bogged down and stressed out with school work. Going back to the race picture, if it helps me run harder, bring it on... if not, throwing it aside. Things I knew and strived for before, but just a renewed resolve at a heart level here before I begin... to wait on God's best, trust and surrender so that He may continue to use me.
Kind of along those lines. Returning from the first camp, I couldn't understand why I had to leave, why God would bring me back 3 times only to send me to PT school and not be able to come back. Why I could only be in Wilmington for a year. Why? Proc? Then through some really challenging conversations kind of coming to this idea of serving God with my best, running my best race and a desire for that no matter what it looks like. He has confirmed PT school so overwhelmingly, I can't back out :-). And I see that it's because that is the most effective way to be able to serve Him, both now and in the future (at least that's my theory right now). As far as how and the details are concerned, I have absolutely no clue. Just trusting that God who sent His own Son to save me is marking out the best race for me, that will bring Him the most glory, and consequently me the most joy and satisfaction, as I saw so clearly in Czech.

Hmmm... that's a lot and may not make any sense whatsoever, but there you have it. I also learned so much about running alongside brothers in Christ, encouraging them and allowing them to lead, while at the same time being bold and confident with the gospel. Have had a tough time articulating that practically, but I'll continue to think through that one... if you have any questions that might guide that thought process... please post/e-mail.

The 2nd camp was awesome. Praying for the follow up with those kids as they strive to build relationships to form a youth group or youth clubs there. The last day I was there we talked about Gifts and the fact that God had given the greatest gift. When asked about that, everyone in my class responded and agreed that it was indeed the greatest gift. One girl then continued saying that it would be foolish not to accept such a gift (as far as I know, she isn't a believer). So neat. Had an amazing last day on the hike walking through the foggy forest worshiping amidst such a beautiful piece of God's creation. Also had many really neat conversations...many of them not with words, but God is bigger than a language barrier and love surpasses all things. These kids had absolutely no self-esteem. I had several opportunities just to build them up, to persuade them that they are indeed worth something. Being faithful to share with them, but at the same time praying that they would truly encounter Christ and see themselves as they are before a holy God, not give the "right" answers and pray a prayer to impress a leader or another camper. That those who do make decisions would not be the same, that they would be a new creation and God would use their excitement and joy to show Himself to a dark and lost country.
Acts 20:24, 26-27
I Corinthians 1:18-20
Two passages that God really used and characterized our time in Czech. Pray they would continue with my time at PT school.

FYI- still working on getting pictures up on facebook and my online album... once I'm in one spot for more than 2 days and make sure I can start school in a few weeks, I'll get that squared away ;)